Last night, after I had posted my blog “Thanksgiving Blessings” and had gone to bed, I suddenly realized that I had failed to mention my most recent blessing—the birth of a great-grandchild. As I pondered this omission I realized that though I have seen baby Noah, it was only when he was still in the hospital incubator. I could not hold him or snuggle him or kiss him. He was tiny and frail and somnolent. So though I have followed his progress with great interest by reading the blog posted by his parents, he is still not quite real to me.
All that will change on December 18 when we come together as a family and I will conduct a ritual welcoming Noah into our family circle. We will talk about our new roles in relationship to him—as grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and in my case as great-grandmother. We will offer advice and support to his parents, Carolyn and Raven; we will express our fondest wishes for this child as he grows up, and then each of us will give our personal blessings to him and his parents.
On that day, in addition to the ceremony, I will finally get to hold Noah, to snuggle him, to press him against my chest, and to lovingly kiss him. On that day he will become real to me, and I can truly say that he is one of the greatest blessings of my old age.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
THANKSGIVING BLESSINGS
There are so many blessings in my life, it is difficult to know where to begin in enumerating them. It is interesting that in my old age I can acknowledge blessings, whereas when I was young, I could only see what was lacking, what deprivations I had endured and how much I suffered because of what I perceived as deficiencies in my upbringing. This is not to say that my childhood was ideal; it certainly was not. We were poor, my mother was terribly depressed because of the handicap (deafness) of my brother, born two years after me, and my father, though unfailingly kind and generous with me, was not able to give my mother the kind of support she needed. There was a lot of tension in the marriage.
And yet, I did well in school, stood out academically in my high school, though I admit there was little competition from my small rural community. Still, I felt proud of my level of accomplishment; being the smartest in the class is not bad, no matter the level of competition. I also took piano and voice lessons—skills which to this day provide me with great pleasure. So, it was not all deprivation. There was considerable substance to my growing up years that it has taken me some time to fully appreciate.
Then there was the blessing of coming to St. Louis, attending Washington University, meeting Norm. What had been up until then extremely limited horizons in my experience, suddenly expanded in amazing ways. Being in a city like St. Louis, away from the confines of a rural Southern Baptist environment was heady, liberating, uplifting. Norm was unlike any man I had ever met before—Jewish, intellectual, arrogant, and yet someone who seemed to find something in me that was appealing. We came from such totally different backgrounds, and yet there was a strong attraction. We almost made it to sixty years of marriage before he died.
Perhaps the greatest blessing of all is the birth of our two daughters. Born only 19 months apart, they grew up in some ways like twins—in the same grade from second grade on—but each found her own way, each developing her own talents and interests and each becoming excellent mothers as well as establishing expertise in a variety of fields. These two women are indeed persons who have developed their own strengths and yet have maintained strong family ties in the process. Jenny is the founder and director of a nonprofit organization, and Laurie has a background in politics and lobbying, and is now the author of a novel, based, of course, on a political theme. Who could have guessed that these two adorable little girls would become such accomplished women?
The men to whom my daughters are married are also great blessings in my life. Each treats me with respect and is unfailingly helpful and kind to me. I am deeply grateful for their attention, their assistance, and their friendship.
But most astonishing of all, perhaps, are my grandchildren. I still feel a large part of myself as a poor, sad little girl living on a farm in North Carolina. It boggles my mind to think that my grandchildren are graduates of prestigious universities, founders of nonprofits, students of art and social work, and all-around marvelous, beautiful, loving human beings. How did I get so blessed? I love each one with all my heart, and I feel lucky every day that I can find so much joy in spending time with each one of them.
I would be remiss if I did not mention the blessing of my friends. I am particularly fortunate in having friends from all age groups. Some are still in their twenties, several in their thirties, many inhabit those middle years of forties and fifties. Then there are those who are closer to my age, and a few who are my actual peers. It is a great privilege for me to have connections with women and men who span so many different age groups. I feel that my relationship with my grandchildren and my young friends infuses me with a kind of energy and vitality that I could not have otherwise. What a great gift they all are to me!
Last, I am blessed by the privilege of being old. I shall be eternally grateful for these later years when I have had the opportunity to look back and reflect on the myriad experiences and relationships that I have had over these eighty-plus years of my life. It has been a long, sometimes challenging journey, and I have had my share of missteps and detours along the way, but I do not, for a moment, regret the trajectory of my life. I rejoice in the years I have had on this earth.
Thank you to all those I love, especially my family: Laurie and Dan, Jenny and Rocky, Carolyn and Raven, Rebecca, Jessie, Rachel and Nick.
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
Mom/Leah/Gaga
And yet, I did well in school, stood out academically in my high school, though I admit there was little competition from my small rural community. Still, I felt proud of my level of accomplishment; being the smartest in the class is not bad, no matter the level of competition. I also took piano and voice lessons—skills which to this day provide me with great pleasure. So, it was not all deprivation. There was considerable substance to my growing up years that it has taken me some time to fully appreciate.
Then there was the blessing of coming to St. Louis, attending Washington University, meeting Norm. What had been up until then extremely limited horizons in my experience, suddenly expanded in amazing ways. Being in a city like St. Louis, away from the confines of a rural Southern Baptist environment was heady, liberating, uplifting. Norm was unlike any man I had ever met before—Jewish, intellectual, arrogant, and yet someone who seemed to find something in me that was appealing. We came from such totally different backgrounds, and yet there was a strong attraction. We almost made it to sixty years of marriage before he died.
Perhaps the greatest blessing of all is the birth of our two daughters. Born only 19 months apart, they grew up in some ways like twins—in the same grade from second grade on—but each found her own way, each developing her own talents and interests and each becoming excellent mothers as well as establishing expertise in a variety of fields. These two women are indeed persons who have developed their own strengths and yet have maintained strong family ties in the process. Jenny is the founder and director of a nonprofit organization, and Laurie has a background in politics and lobbying, and is now the author of a novel, based, of course, on a political theme. Who could have guessed that these two adorable little girls would become such accomplished women?
The men to whom my daughters are married are also great blessings in my life. Each treats me with respect and is unfailingly helpful and kind to me. I am deeply grateful for their attention, their assistance, and their friendship.
But most astonishing of all, perhaps, are my grandchildren. I still feel a large part of myself as a poor, sad little girl living on a farm in North Carolina. It boggles my mind to think that my grandchildren are graduates of prestigious universities, founders of nonprofits, students of art and social work, and all-around marvelous, beautiful, loving human beings. How did I get so blessed? I love each one with all my heart, and I feel lucky every day that I can find so much joy in spending time with each one of them.
I would be remiss if I did not mention the blessing of my friends. I am particularly fortunate in having friends from all age groups. Some are still in their twenties, several in their thirties, many inhabit those middle years of forties and fifties. Then there are those who are closer to my age, and a few who are my actual peers. It is a great privilege for me to have connections with women and men who span so many different age groups. I feel that my relationship with my grandchildren and my young friends infuses me with a kind of energy and vitality that I could not have otherwise. What a great gift they all are to me!
Last, I am blessed by the privilege of being old. I shall be eternally grateful for these later years when I have had the opportunity to look back and reflect on the myriad experiences and relationships that I have had over these eighty-plus years of my life. It has been a long, sometimes challenging journey, and I have had my share of missteps and detours along the way, but I do not, for a moment, regret the trajectory of my life. I rejoice in the years I have had on this earth.
Thank you to all those I love, especially my family: Laurie and Dan, Jenny and Rocky, Carolyn and Raven, Rebecca, Jessie, Rachel and Nick.
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
Mom/Leah/Gaga
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