See that smiling, gray-haired woman with the tiny earplugs? That’s me, listening to my iPod! Over the past few years, I have become increasingly aware of how out of touch I am with much of popular culture, particularly with today’s music. So it occurred to me that one way to become more informed was to get an iPod and have each of my grandchildren prepare for me a mix of their favorite songs. That way I could learn something about current music and also get to know their tastes.
What a great idea! I now am enjoying hearing selections from most of the youngsters, plus some from the in-between generation. My knowledge of contemporary popular music is being broadened, and I am beginning to recognize the differences—and similarities—among the musical preferences of my family members. For example, I have discovered, to my delight, that my granddaughters and I all like folk music and ballads. As a result, it has been easy to attune my ears to their choices, such as The Be Good Tanyas, especially as they render sweet tunes like The Littlest Birds. The same is true of many of the songs of Sarah McLachlan, Alison Krauss, Lucinda Williams, the Indigo Girls, The Great Unknowns, the Dixie Chicks, Beth Orton, Madeleine Peyroux, Norah Jones, and others of their kind. The soft, gentle music of these artists is deeply appealing.
But I was apprehensive about my grandson’s fascination with Hip Hop. How could I possibly embrace that? It seemed foreign and a bit weird to me. But I am learning, even though sometimes I must listen a number of times, or get a copy of the lyrics, before I can understand the words that are spoken so rapidly, frequently with a heavy accent. And, I must admit, quite often I do not like what I hear! The lyrics—a kind of poetry spoken over a strong background beat—are commonly borne out of experiences of violence, gangs, drugs, and abusive relationships.
These sometimes disturbing words reflect the lives of poor, desperate, angry people residing in neglected neighborhoods, a segment of society that I do not know, living as I do an extremely comfortable and protected life. Though I find the language and some of the attitudes, especially toward women, deeply offensive, I also try to keep in mind how different the circumstances of my life have been; I really cannot know what it is to walk in their shoes.
In spite of some of the more objectionable aspects of Hip Hop, however, I am intrigued by the remarkable rhythms and touched by the messages in some of the songs. One, for example, titled Faheem, by the rapper Brother Ali, (one of Nick’s favorite artists) speaks of his deep love for his young son. Here are some of his words:
Faheem…
I was right there for your first breath
I used to lay you on my chest when you slept
I fed, changed, you, read to you, bathed you,
I’m not trying to hold that over your head,
I’m saying thank you.
God put you into my arms for me to teach you…
I tell you these things because I believe in you
Respect, patience, excellence, and truth
And this sad passage:
We live, learn, and figure it out
I just pray that you don’t remember us sleepin’ on the floor
And me cleanin’ mouse droppings out of your toys
It took a lot of hard work for us to get where we at…
And at the end:
I watch you and wonder if I was ever like you
It’s me and you, brother, for life
So when you put me in the ground, look for me in the clouds
You make me the definition of proud
You taught me what this life is really about.
Faheem…
This song is a beautiful testimony of a father’s devotion to his child, whom he raised under obviously difficult conditions. Lyrics such as these have helped me overcome my resistance to Hip Hop, and have made me more open to listening to each work rather than judging the entire genre. Though I probably can never fully grasp this type of music, nor completely understand the circumstances out of which it was generated, I am pleased that I have a greater appreciation of its wide-ranging possibilities.
As for keeping up with popular culture in general, I can only do so much at my age and stage of life. There comes a time, as we grow old, when we begin to withdraw, feeling less urge to participate in the kinds of activities and interests that engaged us earlier in our lives. It is a natural aspect of the aging process. We must weigh our priorities carefully and use our time and energies in ways that are most satisfying and most suitable. Since listening to music is calming and appropriate for a more sedentary life, however, the iPod seems an especially good device for us elders. I heartily recommend it.
